Supporting Neurodiverse Kids at School
We are all unique, and that is something to be excited about! Yet, sometimes, our environment—from social spaces to classrooms—can make our differences feel less exciting. For kids who are neurodiverse, it can sometimes feel downright uncomfortable, stressful, and isolating. Luckily, there are many ways that grownups can support neurodiverse kids so they feel more connected and successful.
Neurodiversity refers to the various ways people think, communicate, learn, and engage with their surroundings. Although neurodiversity applies to everyone, it’s most often associated with ADHD, autism, and learning disabilities.
At Mind, we believe that differences aren’t deficits. At the same time, we understand that many environments are tricky for neurodiverse kids to navigate. This can lead to unhelpful behaviors, social challenges, and academic difficulties. So, it’s important for all of us to foster neurodiverse-friendly spaces, highlight the strengths of neurodiverse kids, and provide support when needed.
One of the most frequently asked questions is, “How can we support our neurodiverse child at school?” So, here are a few quick tips to get you started.
Foster Understanding and Belonging
Understanding is the cornerstone of support and belonging. By fostering a culture of belonging through understanding and education, we can build compassion and acceptance of differences among students, staff, and the parent community. This includes finding ways to raise awareness about neurodiversity within the school community. Some parents have been involved in hosting parent education events (Mind clinicians have done these!), others have read books on neurodiversity in the classroom, and others have shared their favorite resources with the school community.
Belonging is more than just understanding - it’s about taking the next step in helping kids feel a part of their community. “Recently, a parent talked to my child’s kindergarten class about autism and how to be a friend to their autistic classmates,” explains Dr. David Meyerson, neuropsychologist and co-owner of Mind Chicago. “This experience was profoundly meaningful for my child, providing valuable opportunities for him to enhance his play engagement and cultivate stronger friendships with his neurodiverse peers.” Some families and kids find this a meaningful strategy that enhances understanding and belonging. We also recognize that many parents may not have the time or resources to do such work (which is reasonable) - and please remember, it is not the responsibility of neurodiverse students to educate their peers. In these cases, it’s helpful to collaborate with your school, providers, or parent network on accessible ways to increase understanding and belonging in your school community.
Balance Supports with Strengths-Based Approaches
When students are struggling, we can often overlook their incredible strengths. Striking the right balance between supporting the needs of neurodiverse students and highlighting their talents and skills can be tricky. Yet, nurturing students' strengths today is critical to boosting their self-esteem and motivation in the future. We want neurodiverse kids to “accumulate wins” to offset the frequent corrections and redirection they receive. Dr. William Dodson estimates that by the age of 12, kids receive nearly 20,000 more negative comments from adults than their peers without ADHD. Some ideas: celebrate achievements (no matter how small or imperfect), talk to teachers about having your child take on a classroom job or leadership role, and have your child join social groups/clubs aligned with their interests.
Utilize Individualized Education Plans (IEPs), 504 Plans, and other Learning Plans
Neurodiverse students sometimes need classroom or testing accommodations or special education services provided at school. If your child attends a public school, you may request (in writing) that your child’s school team evaluate them for an Individualized Education Plan (IEP) or a 504 Plan. If your child attends a private institution, reach out to school staff about their process for identifying neurodiversity and developing “Learning Plans” (or what your school calls them) for their neurodiverse students. These personalized plans outline specific accommodations, modifications, and goals tailored to your child's needs. Regular meetings with teachers and specialists ensure the plan evolves as your child progresses and develops. Neuropsychological testing can provide important data about your child to develop IEPs, 504 Plans, and other Learning Plans.
Support Executive Functioning
Neurodiverse kids often experience executive functioning (EF) issues. Executive functioning includes planning, prioritizing, organizing, and starting tasks. Although young people benefit from learning and practicing EF skills and strategies, it takes consistent (often daily over many years) support from adults to help kids execute them successfully and benefit from the outcomes. That can sound overwhelming, but you don’t have to do it alone. You and your school community are a team. Talk to your school providers about how to engage in the most helpful executive functioning support on a daily basis or chat with other parents about what’s worked for them. When you need even more support and information, reach out to specialists in neurodiversity, such as neuropsychologists, therapists, and executive functioning specialists.
Supporting neurodiverse students at school requires a collaborative effort from parents, educators, and the community. There are many ways we can create an environment of belonging and success where every child can thrive academically, socially, and emotionally. What has been helpful for you and your child?
If you are wondering if your child is neurodiverse or you are looking for support for your neurodiverse child, please reach out to us at hello@mindchicago.com.
Authored by Mind Chicago therapists Dr. David Meyerson and Dr. Lee Wells
