Plant SEEDS: Cultivating Emotional Growth in Youth - Week 5: Self-Care

During the month of September, we have focused on different ways to reduce emotional vulnerability and improve emotion regulation by utilizing the coping skill SEEDS. We have introduced and reviewed how Sleep, Exercise, Executive functioning, and Diet are important to children’s emotional health and are helpful topics to address as children transition back to school. If you have not been following along yet, be sure to check out our most recent blog posts on these exciting topics!

To conclude our month of SEEDS learning, this week’s focus is on the topic of “Self-care.” One might be thinking, but isn’t all SEEDS self care? Yes, it is! Self-care has many components to it. In fact, all of SEEDS can be considered self-care. Because there are so many areas of self-care that impact our emotional health, the final letter of SEEDS focuses on two equally important parts of self-care which we haven’t yet discussed: Hygiene and Leisure. 

Why is self-care important as kids transition back to school? 

Taking care of oneself is not always easy. During times of stress or transition, such as returning to school or getting back into routines, it can feel more difficult than ever to find motivation to engage in self-care strategies. While hygiene and leisure are very different, research shows that both can be intimately connected with our thoughts, feelings, and actions, playing an important role in improving emotional regulation and reducing emotional vulnerability. Conversely, not engaging in these important self-care skills can lead to reduced confidence, lower self-esteem, and increased feelings of sadness.

Hygiene

Whether your child is back to school in person or attending school via e-learning, hygiene is crucial to emotional health. For children who are experiencing an altered routine, such as e-learning or a hybrid school experience, the practice of hygiene can be particularly challenging. These difficulties can be especially pronounced for students coping with difficult emotions, such as depression and anxiety. 

Many kids may request to attend classes in pajamas or wear the same outfit at home day after day, especially if they are not leaving the house. Research shows that individuals feel more confident and have more energy to learn when wearing clean clothing, particularly attire that is associated with going to school. 

You can enforce good habits and set your student up for success by establishing some basic expectations. These can include changing out of pajamas daily, bathing or showering, and brushing teeth. Many individuals benefit from completing hygiene tasks on a schedule that is aligned with your family's cultural norms and practices. As parents, try modeling these behaviors at home for your child to demonstrate the importance of taking care of oneself, even when you may not be leaving the house or seeing other people. 

With that being said, we understand that getting your child to complete these tasks right now is incredibly challenging. Encouragement to complete hygiene expectations can often be met with irritability and refusal. This reaction can leave any parent feeling confused and unsure as to how to help support their child and increase the likelihood that hygiene is completed. Many parents feel compelled to have their child complete certain tasks, such as brushing teeth, at a specific time of day. While structure can be very helpful for children, an alternative that may increase your child’s success in completing these important self-care steps could be to give your child a time range for a task to be completed, such as between 7-9:30pm. 

Leisure

Leisure is the practice of voluntarily engaging in activities you enjoy. While the idea of enjoyable activities sounds appealing, this is sometimes easier said than done. For students in particular it can be difficult incorporating time for leisure into a busy schedule. Many students report an increase in stress due to returning to school, balancing academics and extracurriculars, and adjusting to new routines and schedules. With all of these stressors, it's no surprise that students are increasingly feeling burned out long before the academic term is over. Feeling this way can impact grades and interpersonal relationships - and can also come at a cost to mental health. If one is finding themselves without any downtime to decompress, it’s time to “design” a more helpful schedule that includes (at least some) explicit time for an activity one finds relaxing or enjoyable. 

• Make leisure a priority. Leisure is not a planned activity, such as attending a sports practice or going to piano lessons; it should be unplanned and self-directed. Therefore, leisure may not always get the same amount of attention and prioritization as other areas of life. Make sure to leave some open time in your day so that you have the opportunity to take leisure. Even just 10 minutes a day can feel meaningful and improve one’s mood. Knowing that you have some downtime in the future can be something exciting to look forward to during the school day, making it that much easier to push through a challenging task. 

• Create a list of activities you enjoy or may be interested in trying. Finding the motivation to get started can be difficult. Having a list of activities on hand may help make problem-solving easier at the moment.  

• Stay social. Leisure includes time spent with friends and communicating with friends. Reaching out to a friend by phone or video call can be a fun way to decompress after the school day is over. 

• Find time to relax and recharge. While leisure does not have to be relaxing, setting aside time to unwind can help improve mood and help a student feel calmer. This can even include fun relaxing moments such as singing in the shower, coloring a mandala, or knitting! 

As a reminder, SEEDS is a collection of many aspects of self-care, including sleep, exercise, executive functioning, and diet, in addition to hygiene and leisure. Practicing and implementing all of the SEEDS is not always easy and can sometimes require additional support. If your child, teenager, or young adult needs support in implementing any aspect of SEEDS, reach out to us at hello@mindchicago.com. We’re here to help.

Authored by Mind Chicago therapist and Clinical Manager, Erika McKnight, LCPC.