Find the Fun: Using Improv for a Richer Parent-Child Relationship

From vacations to camping trips, parents are eagerly seeking new and creative ways to reconnect with their children after a challenging year and a half. In fact, some of those families are trying their hand at improv. Yes, you heard right, I said IMPROV! If you instantly recoiled, I understand. Improvisational theatre sounds intimidating. However, I’m going to provide you a simple introductory technique to help you enjoy this fun and meaningful activity and deepen your relationship with your child. But first, let me tell you a little about improv.

What exactly is improv? Well, improvisational theatre (or improv) is the art of making things up as you go along. Improv can help folks develop confidence and reduce anxiety, as well as foster a deepened sense of trust, support, and a willingness to be vulnerable (and silly) in relationships. At Mind, some therapists even use improvisational theatre to supplement and support science-based therapies such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT). Improv also helps children experience a sense of mastery because you can’t go wrong! No one knows what’s going on or what’s about to happen, so you get to feel a lot of success about the decisions you make. That’s the beauty of improv! 

Okay, but what does improv have to do with relationships? Building and practicing the fundamentals of improv is akin to building and practicing meaningful connections. Improv requires everyone to invest in a sense of trust. Improv asks participants to trust one another enough to follow their lead. It invites lovingkindness and uninvites judgment. Additionally, Improv welcomes participants to let down their guard and lean into silliness. Silliness may not sound important, but it’s a fundamental part of vulnerability in a family system. 

Let’s get to the good part - Doing Improv!!!

Step 1: Make up a title of a story that has never been heard before.

Step 2: Remind yourself, there is no “right” or “wrong” and no one is “in charge” of the story.

Step 3: Begin to create the story together using one word at a time. For example, you start with “Once,” someone else adds “upon a,” and your child adds “unicorn” - and the story goes on! 

Bonus Step: Level up by jumping to different chapters or maybe even writing a prequel or sequel! Level even further up and do a speed round where you try to tell the story as fast as you can. 

Remember the fundamentals: trust, support, vulnerability, and SILLINESS!

For that period of time, the most important thing is creating a brave environment to validate your child’s choices without judgment - and have some fun.

Relationships provide a sense of purpose and belonging, absent of agendas or responsibilities. And after this year, we could all use a little more connection. Improv requires us to pause from the daily routine and mindfully focus on the moment - on our relationship with others. It provides a space for families to enjoy each other in a new and silly way. 

Reach out and tell us how your first family (or partner or friendship) improv experience went. Share your story by emailing niki@mindchicago.com and you may be featured on our social media!

Looking for a creative, evidence-based therapist to help your family deepen connections? Contact us at 312.667.3775 or hello@mindchicago.com. 

~ A special thanks to Niki Aquino, LCSW for authoring this exciting article.