Understanding Labeled vs. Unlabeled Praise
Parent-Child Interaction Therapy (PCIT) is an evidence-based therapy program that aims to improve the quality of the parent-child relationship and change parent-child interaction patterns. If you haven’t already read the article What is PCIT (and Why We Love It!) go ahead and give it a once over. One of the critical components (arguably the most important element) of PCIT is the use of praise to reinforce positive behavior. In PCIT, praise is categorized into two types: labeled and unlabeled. Understanding the differences between these two types and their importance can help parents effectively encourage desirable behaviors in their children.
Unlabeled Praise
Let’s start with unlabeled praise. Unlabeled praise is a general statement of approval or even appreciation. While it can be helpful in some way, it does not specify the behavior that is being praised. Here are some examples of unlabeled praise:
"Good job!"
"Well done!"
"You're great!"
"Awesome!"
Even the CDC notes that while unlabeled praise can make a child feel good, it does not provide specific information about what your child did that was praiseworthy and does not help improve the behavior. This lack of specificity can make it challenging for them to know which behaviors to repeat in the future and what is expected of them.
Labeled Praise
Now, to the good stuff! Labeled praise explicitly states what your child did that you are praising. Think about sharing, using kind words, and helping someone. It involves identifying and describing the specific behavior that you, as parents, caregivers, or family helpers, want to encourage. Here are some examples of labeled praise:
"Great job sharing your toys with your sister!"
"I really appreciate how you cleaned up your room without being asked."
"You did an excellent job finishing your homework on time."
"Thank you for putting your shoes by the door when I asked.”
Labeled praise helps children understand exactly what they did that was positive by clearly identifying the behavior. Sometimes, we assume that our children know what is expected of them, but that is not always the case. This clarity increases the likelihood of the positive behavior occurring again.
Importance of Labeled Praise
Behavior Reinforcement: By identifying the exact behavior, labeled praise reinforces that behavior, making it more likely to be repeated in the future.
Skill Development: Labeled praise can be used to encourage the development of specific skills or behaviors, such as sharing, following instructions, or completing tasks.
Positive Relationships: Using labeled praise can enhance your parent-child relationship by promoting positive interactions and reducing the focus on negative behaviors. Labeled praise makes your child AND you feel good!
Self-Esteem and Confidence: When children know exactly what they did well, it can boost their self-esteem and confidence as they feel appreciated for their efforts.
Now, Let’s Put It Into Action!
During Playtime: "I love how you are using your imagination to build that rocket ship with your blocks!"
At Mealtime: "Great job staying in your seat!" Or “I love that you eat all your vegetables!”
When Following Rules: "Thank you for putting on your seatbelt as soon as you got in the car."
While Doing Chores: "I really appreciate you taking out the trash without being reminded."
How to Use Labeled Praise In Your Daily Interactions
To effectively use labeled praise, parents can:
Observe and Identify: Pay attention to the specific behaviors you want to encourage. You can even pick 1-2 specific behaviors you want to see more.
Be Specific: Clearly describe the behavior when giving praise.
Be Sincere: Ensure that your praise is genuine and heartfelt. Be authentic to yourself and your interaction with your child.
Be Timely: Provide praise as soon as possible after the behavior occurs to strengthen the association between the behavior and the positive feedback.
Incorporating labeled praise into daily interactions with children can be a powerful tool for parents. As a bonus, label praise doesn’t just have to be limited to children. Adults who use this skill are often regarded as better bosses, partners, friends and/or family members.
Authored by Mind Chicago therapist Courtney Chamerski, LCSW
